Thursday, March 16, 2017

The letter I wished I'd once received

Our admissions director confirmed today what I'd been dreading to hear - Max is headed to a new school next year. For all the support we've tried to give him, we could not provide the tools he needed to make it through here. I am so disheartened, and yet I'm trying to remain hopeful that we've planted enough of a seed...that he will land in a place that's better suited to meet his needs. Once I heard, I drafted a note to him I'm not sure I'll give him on the last day of school. It feels heady and might be more than a rising second grader can take in or comprehend. Maybe I'm worried it says too much about me, about what I needed when I was younger and less about what he needs or can handle right now. Still, if I had the courage, this is the letter I'd send:

Goomy,

As you get ready to embark on a new adventure, I wanted to send you off with a few words from me. You were one of my favorite things about teaching here last year. I loved the times we'd sit together and just draw. I didn’t even really mind the millions of times you teased me by shouting “Naked Mole Rat!” after you discovered how much I.Hate.Rats. It's been so awesome getting to know your brother now - I love seeing how much you two look forward to spotting each other at carpool at the end of the day. He admires and looks up to you a lot. I know school has been tough for you sometimes. When I was little, I had some tough times, too. I felt like no one else was experiencing what I was going through or feeling. But every person you meet will have some sort of challenge in life. And these truly are the things that will build your character, and make you a better, stronger person down the road. Don’t give up on yourself. Don’t tell yourself that you're not good enough or that you're so different from everyone else. Besides, the ways that you are different are pretty wonderful - you're incredibly smart, creative, funny and complex. The important people in your world will see you for all these things and more – don’t worrying about the ones who don’t. School can be hard sometimes, but don’t give up on it. There are subjects and things that you don’t even know about yet that will really hit a nerve with you someday soon. Your job will be to zone in on the things that really click, and find a way to get more of them into your daily life. But you have lots of things to learn about between now and then. I tell you all this because it is one thing to hear from your family members how great you are, but it is something else to have someone outside your family see all the gifts you possess and remind you that you truly are awesome. I believe in you, and I know you will do amazing things wherever you land.

Love,

Carla

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